The Family in Ron’s Hospital Room

This Is Going to Hurt

This flow traces Kay’s conflicted role as doctor and friend while Ron’s father faces terminal cancer.

increasing

Bearing strength in each event

decreasing

A Friend Asks A Friend Asks from "This Is Going to Hurt". A Friend Asks Symptoms shared privately Ron describes his father’s weight loss and severe pain, then asks Kay what may be wrong.

A Friend Asks from "This Is Going to Hurt". A Friend Asks Symptoms shared privately Ron describes his father’s weight loss and severe pain, then asks Kay what may be wrong.

A Friend Asks Symptoms shared privately Ron describes his father’s weight loss and severe pain, then asks Kay what may be wrong. Kay’s medical instincts suggest a serious cancer with little chance of cure. Reassurance instead of candour He tells Ron that the GP is doing the right things and that the illness might be nothing. He knows that reassurance is not the answer he would give a patient.

The Father in Hospital The Father in Hospital from "This Is Going to Hurt". The Father in Hospital Illness made visible Kay visits Ron’s father, who has lost more weight and appears as skin and bone.

The Father in Hospital from "This Is Going to Hurt". The Father in Hospital Illness made visible Kay visits Ron’s father, who has lost more weight and appears as skin and bone.

The Father in Hospital Illness made visible Kay visits Ron’s father, who has lost more weight and appears as skin and bone. The cancer is clearly taking its toll. Conversation through humour Ron’s father jokes about the cost of looking good for his funeral and marvels at modern medical machines. Humour lets the family speak about death without reducing him to the illness.

A Question about the Future A Question about the Future from "This Is Going to Hurt". A Question about the Future The cure he cannot promise Ron’s father asks whether cancer might be curable in twenty years.

A Question about the Future from "This Is Going to Hurt". A Question about the Future The cure he cannot promise Ron’s father asks whether cancer might be curable in twenty years.

A Question about the Future The cure he cannot promise Ron’s father asks whether cancer might be curable in twenty years. Kay does not know whether hope or honesty would be kinder, and admits that he mostly knows about vaginas. A sharper observation The patient asks why people say someone has lost a battle with cancer rather than cancer winning. His joke exposes the unfair burden of treating illness as a personal contest.

An Enjoyable Visit An Enjoyable Visit from "This Is Going to Hurt". An Enjoyable Visit The familiar personality Ron’s father keeps making jokes as he always has.

An Enjoyable Visit from "This Is Going to Hurt". An Enjoyable Visit The familiar personality Ron’s father keeps making jokes as he always has.

An Enjoyable Visit The familiar personality Ron’s father keeps making jokes as he always has. Kay had been nervous before visiting, but finds himself enjoying their conversation. Memory protected The father’s warmth makes things easier for friends and family and helps them remember him as himself. The visit offers connection without pretending that treatment can reverse his condition.

The Friendship Frays The Friendship Frays from "This Is Going to Hurt". The Friendship Frays Grief and absence Kay later misses Ron’s father’s funeral because of work.

The Friendship Frays from "This Is Going to Hurt". The Friendship Frays Grief and absence Kay later misses Ron’s father’s funeral because of work.

The Friendship Frays Grief and absence Kay later misses Ron’s father’s funeral because of work. His medical presence during the illness cannot make up for his absence at the family’s public farewell. A complicated debt Ron’s later anger reflects both grief and years of missed events. The episode links Kay’s wish to help to the limits imposed by his own working life.

18 November 2008

November 2009

18 November 2009

By July 2010